August 14 at 1:15pm ·
“Please tell us truthfully that you 1. Don’t live in a mansion, 2. that you’ve made and eaten Kraft Macaroni Cheese in the past year, 3. that you’ve driven around to find a parking spot so you don’t pay for parking at a sporting event and 4. You haven’t pulled a Dan Patrick and dropped celeb names you’ve met or hung with in an attempt to score with someone.”
1) I don’t live in a mansion. I house sat in one once, and I kinda liked it. But I’ve never owned one, and have no plans to. My current apartment is very modest, relative to the zip code. It’s the same one I’ve come home to for the last 14 years. With the exception of a small smokestack that partially obscures Treasure Island and Alcatraz, the view is the best thing about it.
2)I do. But in the interest of full disclosure, I also have some Ancient Harvest, Mac and Cheese with quinoa. (It’s important to try new things.)
3) I can’t recall the last time I went to a sporting event and didn’t take public transportation.
4) Who is Dan Patrick?